After I published Forever Kalei’s Mom, I gave a copy of the book to a good neighbour of mine. After congratulating me he said, “Are you happy now?” I must confess; that question took me by surprise as I had no idea I appeared unhappy.

As I stood there wondering what to say, he added, “Now that you have published your book, have you found peace?” Ah ha, I thought, he is not asking a book question, he is asking a grief question. Here I am excited about publishing a book and all he can see is the subject matter rather than the accomplishment of completing such a monumental task. Now I knew what to say.

“If you are asking me if publishing Forever Kalei’s Mom has ended my sorrow, the answer is no. Writing about grief will not bring Kalei back to life nor does it change how much her death hurts. I could write a thousand books and the pain would still be there. That being said, did all the research and analysis I did over the years help me understand and manage my grief world better? Yes, of course it did. I would be surprised if most authors, regardless of book content, did not walk away wiser after completing their works. I am very proud of myself for reaching my publishing goal. Am I happy I was able to do that? Absolutely! Is the feeling I get the same kind of happy that I knew before Kalei died? No, that kind of pure joy is gone forever. But I have to tell you, when I held the first copy of Forever Kalei’s Mom in my hands, I came pretty darn close.”