In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, it is 10 years now… I miss you so much! I can’t help it, I just do. Time became both hated enemy and grief teacher the second life left your body. With heartless determination that second turned into minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and much too soon…an unimaginable year. One year turned into two, three, four and well, just so many more. Oh the agony of time! I…..
In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, it is now 9 years since I last held you in my arms. The space between that moment and today is an ever widening chasm. All that is left of our life together is 16.5 years of well-worn memories and then nothing but memory emptiness. I struggle to grasp the harshness of that reality for the pain of knowing you are dead continues to…..
In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, today marks eight years since you died. There has been much change this past year. I no longer ask the question, “Why did you have to die?” Nor do I ask God for a miracle and your return. Deep in my soul, I finally understand He cannot bring you back. I have also learned asking “why” does not matter for there is no answer…..
In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, I have buried so many so many dreams in the past 7 years. Graduation, university, boyfriends and countless other growing up ‘firsts’ that can never be. One by one, my mother’s heart has laid them to rest. My head understands they should have died the moment you took your last breath, but my heart still grieves for each unfulfilled dream as their time comes…..
“My Sweetie Pie, it is now six years since you died. Time continues to force your life deeper into the shadows. For most, your body is a but distant memory. Your spirit, a comfort no longer needed. Kalei, please know my love for you is too strong to ever lose sight of you in the shadows of time. I will always look for you and grieve when all I see is a dream. I will always reach for your spirit and rejoice…..
KALEI JASMINE HOLIZKI January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, today marks five years since you died. Five years of waking up to a world filled with unspeakable pain. The screams deep inside my soul echo that tick tock agony. It does not matter – five years or fifty – I must carry this burden of sorrow until time decides it my turn to know eternity’s truth. Until then my angel, I love you and miss you…sooooo very much! “ Forever, Kalei’s Mom
KALEI JASMINE HOLIZKI January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “No matter how many years go by, you have remained at my side. In death as in life, you continue to be my strength. As long as I feel your love, the pain of your death is bearable. As long as I feel your spirit, the belief in your continued existence grows. For four years you have shown me that heaven and earth are not that far apart. Thank-you Sweetie Pie!…..
KALEI JASMINE HOLIZKI January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “If I could have a lifetime wish a dream that would come true, I’d pray to God with all my heart for yesterday and you. A thousand words can’t bring you back I know because I tried. Neither will a thousand tears I know because I cried. You left behind my broken heart and happy memories too. But I never wanted memories… I only wanted you.” Forever, Kalei’s Mom by…..
KALEI JASMINE HOLIZKI Born January 23, 1985 – Died August 20, 2001 “As long as I can I will look at this world, for both of us. As long as I can I will laugh with the birds, for both of us. As long as I can I will sing with the flowers, for both of us. As long as I can I will pray to the stars, for both of us.” Forever, Kalei’s Mom Part of a poem by Sancha…..
My grieving journey…from a different perspective
Every year at this time I begin the process of writing Kalei’s annual In Memoriam. As she will have been dead 15 years this August 20th, I find myself acknowledging another milestone. I don’t know why this is but for some reason increments of 5 and 10 feel BIGGER as far as her death anniversary date goes and this year is no different…15 feel REALLY BIG. Maybe that is why I found myself looking back at all the earlier memoriam submissions…something…..
Follow me on Twitter
My TweetsRecent Posts
Recent Comments
- Stephanie on In a little over an hour, Kalei will have been dead longer than she lived.
- Lorene Holizki on In a little over an hour, Kalei will have been dead longer than she lived.
- Lorene Holizki on In a little over an hour, Kalei will have been dead longer than she lived.
- Irene Sagon on In a little over an hour, Kalei will have been dead longer than she lived.
- Lorene Holizki on In a little over an hour, Kalei will have been dead longer than she lived.
Archives
- August 2023
- August 2022
- August 2021
- August 2020
- August 2019
- January 2019
- August 2018
- March 2018
- February 2018
- August 2017
- July 2017
- May 2017
- April 2017
- March 2017
- February 2017
- January 2017
- August 2016
- July 2016
- June 2016
- May 2016
- April 2016
- March 2016
- February 2016
- January 2016
- December 2015
- November 2015
- October 2015
- September 2015
- August 2015