August 20th and another year…21
In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, there is no doubt you left a permanent space in this world when you died. Even after all these years precious memories bring smiles. Unfulfilled dreams, well, not so much. Your spirit continues to be a part of my life and the lives of those who love you. When we ‘feel’ a gentle Angel push in the right direction we are grateful. When we…..
In Loving Memory Kalei Jasmine Holizki January 23, 1985 – August 20, 2001 “My Sweetie Pie, 2019 marks 18 years since your earth life ended. I cannot help but bow my head in sorrow as I FEEL the truth of those words. Even now, grateful as I am for the gift of 16 years together, I long for more time with you. Here with me! By my side! Where you belong! And then, I smile as my mind takes…..
Well, it is Feb 10th and I am about to board a plane to Mexico…for the first time. I am looking forward to this new experience especially as I am going with Kalei’s Uncle John and Aunty Carol who I enjoy travelling with. We are heading to a small fishing village called Los Ayala. It is a popular winter vacation destination for so many Saskatchewan folks it is often referred to as Little Saskatchewan. While we were waiting to board…..
Unlike many moms I have talked to, I have yet to see Kalei in a dream. I don’t know why that is, it just is. Maybe one day…at least I hope so. In the meantime, I do my best to remain alert and open to her presence in my non-sleeping hours. It is not easy to keep your mind aware of a kind of 6th sense communication, especially when the messages often seem very cryptic or, well, sort of multi-dimensional……
Every now and then someone will say to me, “When you wrote and published Forever Kalei’s Mom, you took something bad — her death — and turned it into something good.” While I might not totally subscribe to the accuracy of that statement (it implies a conscious plan, and the book was anything but that), I appreciate the meaning behind their words. For me, the something of value (sorry, I just can’t use good) comes from the sum of three things: Kalei’s life, her death and the grief…..
Prior to Kalei’s death I used to have a pretty trusting nature. I worked off the theory that if I did not lie, cheat or steal from my fellow man, they would provide me the same courtesy – I could trust them and they could trust me. While I learned some caution as I got older, generally it seemed like a reasonable model to live by. The same goes for trusting the strength of the circle of life. I figured as long as…..
In the previous post I talked about how much I loved receiving angel gifts on a Kalei event day. Well, sometimes, when I am really lucky, I am gifted with one out of the blue. By 2010 I had finished a major project —the landscaping in my backyard. It was now the peaceful and safe sanctuary I had envisioned when I responded to a grief need to avoid as much of the outside world as possible. But the completion of…..
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